Mullah Nasruddin

 “Nasrudin, how does one become wise?” Nasrudin: “Listen attentively to wise people when they speak. And when someone is listening to you, listen attentively to what you are saying!“

“Nasrudin, how come every morning, some people are traveling in one direction, and some in others?” Nasrudin: “Because if everyone traveled in the same direction, the Earth would tip over!“

Nasrudin loaded a barrel of cherries on his donkey, and went off to the bazaar to sell them. On his way, a group of about a dozen children noticed him, and were elated to see all the cherries he was carrying. They began dancing and singing in anticipation of eating […]

One night, Nasrudin awoke and exclaimed to his wife, “Wife! Please get up! I have just been divinely inspired! Get me a pencil and piece of paper at once!“ His wife lit a candle, fetched the pencil and paper, and handed it to Nasrudin. Nasrudin wrote rapidly, and was about […]

Nasrudin was digging outside, and his neighbor asked him, “What are you working on?” “Well,” Nasrudin replied, “There’s a lot of excess dirt on the road, so I’m digging a hole to bury it in.” “But what are you going to do with the dirt that you ’re digging out […]

Nasrudin and his wife were sleeping late one night, and were awoken by the sound of two men arguing intensely in the street. “I’m going to go find out what they’re fighting about”, Nasrudin told his wife. “Just go back to sleep”, his wife remarked. “This has nothing to do […]

Nasrudin and some others were in the town square one day, and the topic of conversation turned to how they changed since they were younger. Some of them talked about how they were wiser, and some talked about how they were weaker. Nasrudin spoke up and said, “Not only am […]

Mulla Nasrudin had two wives, one much older than the other. “Which of us do you love the most?” asked the older wife one day. “I love you both the same,” answered Nasrudin, wisely. Not satisfied with this answer, the older wife continued, “If the two of us wives fell […]

The Sultan was told by his teacher that lying was a great crime and should be banned. So the Sultan ordered his executioner to the city gate and told him to ask each person entering the city why he was visiting and execute any who lied. Next morning the Mullah […]

Once Mulla Nasruddin was forced to come to the court because he has been found again drunk on the street. The magistrate said, “Nasruddin, I remember seeing you so many times for this same offence. Have you got any explanation for your habitual drunkenness?” Nasruddin said, “Of course, your Honor. […]

One sunny spring afternoon Nasrudin was sitting peacefully by the imposing North gate of Samarkand watching the colourful string of caravans following each other and followed in turn by the curious glances of the populace. A stranger, an obviously rich merchant from Persia about to leave town, felt attracted by […]

Mullah came upon a frowning man walking along the road to town. “What’s wrong?” he asked. The man held up a tattered bag and moaned, “All that I own in this wide world barely fills this miserable, wretched sack.” “Too bad,” said Mullah, and with that, he snatched the bag […]

The Mullah was beating a drum as hard as he could. The neighbors were fed up at the racket and asked him what he was doing. He replied, “Keeping wild tigers at bay.” A neighbor shouted, “But Mullah, there are no wild tigers within a thousand miles of here.” The […]

Walking one evening along a deserted road, Nasruddin saw a troop of horsemen rapidly approaching. His imagination started to work; he saw himself captured or robbed or killed and frightened by this thought he bolted, climbed a wall into a graveyard, and lay down in an open grave to hide. […]

Mulla Nasruddin was fishing with his friend. “I think I should get a divorce,” his friend said. “My wife hasn’t spoken to me in three months.” “I’d think twice if I were you,” said the Mulla. “Wives like that are hard to find.”

A certain man asked the famous Mulla Nasrudin, “What is the meaning of fate?” Mulla replied, “Assumptions.” “In what way?” the man asked again. Mulla looked at him and said, “You assume things are going to go well and when they do not, you call that bad luck. You assume […]

 Mulla Nasruddin used to purchase shoes which were too tight for him, one size too small. He was continually complaining and grumbling to everybody, “I will die with these shoes!” People said, “Why don’t you change them?” When he came the next time to the shoe store to change them, […]

The Mullah’s wife sent him to buy some bread. When the Mullah arrived at the bread shop he saw a long line waiting to buy bread. He thought he would do something to get in front of the line. He shouted, “People, don’t you know the Sultan’s daughter is getting […]

A man who went into a shop and asked the shopkeeper, “Do you have leather?” “Yes,” said the shopkeeper. “Nails?” “Yes.” “Thread?” “Yes.” “Needle?” “Yes” “Then why don’t you make yourself a pair of boots?”    

People ran to tell the Mullah that his mother-in-law had fallen into the river. “She will be swept out to sea, for the torrent is very fast here,” they cried. Without a moment’s hesitation Nasrudin dived into the river and started to swim upstream. “No!” they cried, “DOWNSTREAM! That is […]